boundaries

friday 27th july 2001 @ 10:12 p.m.

we all create boundaries to help categorise our relationships. maybe it's human nature. i don't think people like to be categorised, i know i don't, but it helps. we all need words to identify ourselves, to give ourselves a place in the world. a space in the world.

the boundaries that i set years ago are shifting and sliding to accomodate my experiences. how do we all decide where to draw the line between dislike and hate, like and love, love and friendship. perhaps i love all my friends for the great things they add to my life.

i ponder this as my friendship with J stretches and alters with every moment that we spend together. every touch, every kiss, every hug, every silence is significant. i have no doubt about my love for her. i have no doubt about my passion for her. it's just that the guidelines have changed. i am yet to work out the rules of this new game. she rushes too fast, impatient and impetuous. where i drift towards the sun, she flies headlong into the brightness.

where our similarities brought us together as friends years ago, now i am more aware of the opinions that separate us.

acceptance can be a hard lesson to learn.