unable to focus

monday 30th july @ 12:50 a.m.

"sometimes we choose the path we follow.

Sometimes our choices are made for us.

And sometimes we have no choice at all." - neil gaiman

it seems i have many choices and yet none at all. the life that i have created for myself in this unforgiving world is restricting me, holding me back. i am tied down and chained. i can break out, be free but only with hurt and pain. sacrifice is a big word.

would i feel worse if i had no choice at all.

still in love to the point of madness and depravity. my pulse rises and falls with expectation. but you are too far to hear my heartbeat. unable to focus, unable to blink. you sit on the inside of my eyes, looking in.

you are swallowing me whole and i adore it. i want to sink into your calm waters and drown with you wrapped around me. i want to feel your soul in my mouth as i kiss you. i want to taste your warmth as i drink you. i want to hear your whispers as we fall together, alone.

you are my lust, my love, my reason.