winter, work and worry

sunday 8th december 2002 @ 23:25

grey days and wet roads. the winter streets are not as quiet as they might be. shoppers from near and far descend upon the city, tripping through overcrowded stores for seasonal treasures. working late tonight with an elderly lady who does not know it's nearly christmas and as she gasps for breath i realise that she will not live long enough to be reminded.

my dreams are vivid lately. and often disturbing enough to wake me. and i lie in darkness trying to decipher the symbols and metaphors. a symptom of an overcrowded mind searching for a future while attempting to diagnose the pains of the past.

i still have no road to follow, although celestial signs would have me make powerful career decisions. on the up side, my obsession with those beautiful grey eyes is waning with the lack of your presence. and the absence of your call is losing strength. ...you have no power over me...

reading: the wind-up bird chronicle by haruki murakami

hearing: everyday hurts by sad cafe

wanting: to feel less isolated

fearing: my own negative spirals, sometimes every moment is a struggle against myself