waiting for the sinister encore

Friday, Jan. 20, 2012 @ 17:21

medicated, sedated, alone. another episode passes. I am bruised, battered, exhausted.
the colour has drained away along with my energy. even if I could raise my head to talk no words will come out. I have no breath to make them.
his impatience, his violence has stunned me into silence. The stillness now as he leaves me here is calm but sinister. waiting for his return. now the silence threatens me with it's hidden darkness.
I had my role to play and I stuffed my lines and wrecked the ending. but it's not over. we haven't played the encore yet, the curtain call, the standing ovation.
it won't matter. when the lights go down I won't be able to find the exit anyway.