winter comfort

Tuesday, Feb. 13, 2007 @ 23:38

i came for comfort and found only empty spaces. those once relied upon pages now abandoned or lost. i'm floundering in the vast emotions of this place and struggling to find a warm spot in the sun. all i'm seeing is cold shadows and loss.
this time of year the weather sucks out my energy and uses it to ravage the streets with it's accumulated rage. in it's wake i'm teary and sad and drained of all happiness. somehow every year we also make it to spring but right now it is hard to see the road ahead. the rain is heavy and the winds powerful. they will pin us down and remove all hope.
i am full of fear. and dread. and saturated by the shameful memories of lovers past and friends i miss. my shoulders ache with the weight of my mistakes. i am tired, weary, lacking.