you know i love you, but don't run away. it's okay to be friends really...

Monday, Oct. 28, 2002 @ 22:21

don't pretend you don't know that i want you. don't pretend that you don't like the compliments i pay you. either get over here and kiss me or tell me i'm not the one you want. just stop and be honest. because i won't stop loving you until i know for sure you can't love me too.

and it's crazy.

i know that.

and don't do that thing where you tell me i don't really feel this way.

coz you are not inside my head.

and cannot know that it is you i think of every night when i fall asleep.

and that it is your name i hope to see when the phone rings.

and stop telling me how "nice" i am if it's not good enough to be more than friends.

actually. thinking about it. you don't love me do you. you probably don't even like me that much. or you would call. and you would visit. and you wouldn't say these things at all.

okay. i think i figured it out. this is the point where i realise you just want to be friends. and this is where i'm grateful that we have this beautiful friendship.

and this is where i get to go to bed alone, again.

and wonder if i made a fool of myself.

coz i'm good at that.

this is no movie.

reading: microserfs by douglas coupland

hearing: tyketto and steve perry

wanting: wish i could tell you all this stuff and know you wouldn't just run away

fearing: not fearing, just analysing