is the exit signposted?

Sunday, Oct. 23, 2011 @ 00:56

Who knew it would come to this? Even with my prettiest tarot I could not have predicted such chaos and unrest. My love is distant, so much so we have not touched in nearly 10 years, yet still she waits for a day when we can be reunited. as do I as another postcard heads her way. I long for it now that wars are raging around me. She seems the calm and serene and the safe.

So with recent panics and mentalism worthy of note, I am de-friended and left feeling ashamed, stupid, worthless. What hope is there for a girl with no prospects, no money, no friends or social skills and the optimism of death row? I fear for myself it's true. but in this whirlwind of chores and obligations to others, with added resentment and exhaustion, I no longer know which way is up or indeed out.